Heart Trouble
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Genesis 12:1-5
1. Now the Lord said to Abram, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house to the land that I will show you. 2. And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. 3. I will bless those who bless you, and him who curses you I will curse; and by you all the families of the earth shall bless themselves." 4. So Abram went, as the Lord had told him; and Lot went with him. Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran. 5. And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother's son, and all their possessions which they had gathered, and the persons that they had gotten in Haran; and they set forth to go to the land of Canaan.
I don’t know about you, but sometimes I hear God calling and directing me just as clearly and succinctly as He did Abram. And I respond, “OK God, I’m ready! Let’s do this.” And I work up enthusiasm and I truly do desire to be obedient. And I comply. For a while. . . Partly . . . Sort of . . . Kind of . . . Almost . . . Until I arrive at the “Oh for heaven’s sake! This is just too hard” point. And I have all kinds of reasons . . . excuses . . . identified obstacles . . . and before you know it, my life is one long string of If onlies. And I wonder what if’s.
No, I’m not really intending to beat myself up. Nor am I seeking encouragement to not be so hard on myself. I just flat out know when I’m not doing what God desires of me, and I don’t feel “right” until I comply. We have explained to our son that “Delayed obedience is Disobedience.” And I could write a book on all the ways I’ve run from God! Delayed obedience? How about blatant disobedience? My kids would have been punished for that when they were younger.
How about you? Are you fighting God about something in your life? Are you delaying your obedience? Because . . . But . . . If only . . . As soon as . . . Of course, if you recall, later in the Bible we read that Abram and Sarai thought they needed to tell God how to manage their lives, didn’t they? God told Abram he and Sarai would have a child, and Abram would be the father of generations – the founding father of our faith. And he laughed at God! And He and Sarai hatched a plan to make Abram a father (with Sarai’s slave) so they could “help God along.” So maybe it’s not so uncharacteristically human to respond to God’s call with “Who? Me?” or “Wait a minute, I’ve got a better idea!”
God puts a call on our hearts and He intends for us to respond. Sometimes He calls us in big ways – like going to Divinity School or leaving everything behind and going to foreign country to live in poverty and serve the native people. Sometimes it may require that we leave friends behind. Sometimes it’s a small thing, like reach out to others in compassion and love. Or collect food for a food bank. Or send a note of encouragement to someone. Whatever it is, you know you won’t feel “right” until you comply. Or is it just me, again?
It really boils down to answering these questions. “Do I trust God to take care of me?” And, “Do I believe God wants good and abundance and blessings for me?” Finally, “Do I believe I can do anything God directs me to do, as long as I rely upon His power and wisdom?” The first two are easy to answer – and answer honestly. Of course. Yes. Definitely. Certainly. You don’t even need to ask!” The final one? Hmmmm. Give me some time on that one – because I want to be honest. I say it with my mouth, and in my head, I do believe. It’s my heart that gives me trouble. I am human, and I possess all the glorious qualities of a human being! I also possess that human bent on sinning – denying God; defying God.
My prayer today is that you listen with your ears and with your heart when God calls you. And that you will respond with your heart – in immediate, complete, absolute obedience.
Mary
